With the new year well on the way it’s almost time to think about all things love. How do we keep the love alive? Some interesting research recently crossed my desk. The title was ‘Forget Romance and Think Excitement’. Keeping the love alive is always key to the work I do. Relationships need input and nurturing and keeping the spark can at times feel rather tricky at the end of yet another exhausting week. So, plumping for a pleasant evening out is good enough – surely? Well not according to this research. Doing something exciting or out of the ordinary that makes us feel a thrill is what can inject our relationship with excitement that we attribute to our partners. There’s no need to go skydiving but doing something novel with our partner engenders the loving feeling. Actively working at increasing the good experiences will impact positively on even the most ho-hum relationships. The research goes on to say if we couple that with pretending it is a first date suddenly Cupid will be flying on steroids. Have a look around, that comedy club you always promised to visit, the salsa dancing you said you would never do or perhaps that rock climbing wall may not be such a silly idea after all So surprise yourself: do something different this Valentine’s Day and Cupid may very well revisit.
Is your relationship in the doldrums need some help?
Pam Custers is an experienced therapist working with individuals, couples and families. Accred MBACP. MA. BA (Psych) Hons and is a RELATE trained and registered counsellor. Contact 07572 841 388 www.pamcusters.co.uk
